Quirky Humans: Kid Wonder

Alright so he’s not really a kid, he’s 15 but like he picks everything up at work with the snap of your fingers. He knows how to close just from watching others. He knows what to do during slow times. He’s quick during fast times, and he’s probably the only one who knows how to actually bag groceries. Which is always nice when he’s helping you.

He floats through school and still gets good grades, a little rebellious as he skips almost all his classes. He’s bilingual, goes to french-immersion and is generally a good kid. But if we were in high school together he would have been the kid I avoided because he’s kind of an ass sometimes and plays too many sports.



Quirky Humans: What is this? Manager

“What is this?”

“My sweater.”

“What is this?”

“The owner’s change for her coffee.”

“What is this?”

“Notes for the schedule you need to fix.”

“What is this?”

“A request for a day off.” On the paper with ‘Request for Days Off’ on it.

I have a manager, she’s in charge of a lot of things. She should not necessarily be in charge of a lot of things. I think I’d trust her with three maybe four things. Answering the phone and balancing the store are two of them. Being a decent human being makes this five actually. She’s a very nice woman. To like three of her workers. Out of maybe 16.

Things I would not trust her with:

Making a schedule,

Fixing  a schedule,

Remembering why she came downstairs (Hint: It had something to do with the schedule),

Remembering where she left her second coffee (She lost the first one),

Dealing with unruly customers,

Diffusing arguments,

Hiring people.

I swear she can be an awesome woman, she can do paperwork and office stuff easily but then they had to go and give her a bunch of other things and I think it just destroyed her brain a bit. No one should be expected to remember everything this woman has to remember.

“What is this?”

“Your umbrella from last week.”

“What is this?”

“A box?”

“What is it doing here?”

“I was refilling bags.”

“It shouldn’t be here.” Proceeds to put away the box I still need.

“What is this?”

“Someone forgot their mitts.”

“What is this?”

“I don’t know.”

“Where’d it come from?”

“I don’t know?”

“What should I do with it?”



Quirky Humans: Wonder Woman

The responsible young adult. Literally the eldest sibling stereotype from movies. She is composed, reasonable, a defender of the small children but omg do not piss her off she could probably destroy you. She’s this tiny wisp of a person but she could intimidate a grown man. She’s only 25 and has more economic confidence than someone in a well-paid suit and cubicle job. She could run the whole store single handedly and do it better than the people running it right now. She is wonder woman and somehow we’ve become the dream team. She’s like my favourite coworker to close with. She loves her pot bellied pig and is our fastest cashier. She could clear ten people in less than 5 minutes I swear.

Quirky Humans: SmartMouth

Let’s start this off with one of my favourite coworkers. I will try to describe them in a way that really gives their personalities justice.

The smart-mouth. There’s this one coworker who’s been working at this store for at least 4 years. He’s invaluable to them which is why he can get away with having the worst potty mouth I’ve ever heard. He can be both irritating and hilarious. He works in three different departments and will drop everything to come in should someone call in sick.

He always needs to have the last word. He’s a cocky brat in shorter terms. But he’s incredibly sensitive to criticism. If asked he’ll work like a dog, but damn do not get on his bad side. He will get his job done but not without butting heads every step of the way. He’s probably one of my favourite coworkers. He is not for customer service though, he will never ever be able to cover a cashiers shift.

He’s crass, with very dark humor, and a knack for pissing people off. He’s also bilingual, can cook and would have an amazing resume once he finally gets out of this store.

Some days though he’s the sweetest young man. He can be polite and respectful but you have to earn that respect. There’s no short cuts with this guy. One time he was so stressed, and almost to the point of tears when he very politely asked for help. He’s not above asking for help and he naturally is very helpful himself.